Wedding Reception with no children

• Some couples, for reasons of their own, do not want for children to attend their wedding reception. The reasons for this may range from trying to lower costs by trimming wedding guests from the list, or not wanting to put up with potential crying, wailing, or hyperactivity on the part of the little guys. The debate on this topic can get fierce. Some people argue that it its rude and improper to exclude the younger members of a family from the wedding guest list. Some insisting that a wedding is all about family and eliminating children from attendance at the wedding is inappropriate. If you are thinking about an adult’s only wedding reception, it’s critically important that you consider the matter carefully and realize that some may find this to be offensive, ungracious, or downright cold and inconsiderate. Weddings are not typically adult only events in fact, throughout history, children have played an important role in the symbolism associated with weddings and some might be offended that you are dictating that they must leave their little ones at home. However, your wedding day is YOUR day and the bottom line is that you have a right to be happy and have it your way on this most important day of your entire life. If, after carefully considering this, you decide that this is the way it is going to be, you should follow the rules for this delicate situation:
•  Indicate that the reception is to be adults only by having the words "Adults Only Reception" or "Adult Reception" printed along with the reception location and time on the invitation. *Do not use phrases such as NO KIDS, NO CHILDREN, etc. The only correct wording is Adult Reception or Adults Only Reception.
•  This information should be printed by the printer on all invitations. You must never write ANYTHING by hand onto the invitation itself whether it pertains to this or any other matter. Doing so is considered socially incorrect (tacky!) and inappropriate. 
• If you are excluding some children, the rule is that you must exclude all children. There must not be different rules for different people or some individuals will be deeply offended and hurt and rightly so. The only possible exception to this would be any children who are in the wedding party. While some etiquette experts feel that it may be alright to make this exception, there is a stronger belief that if the reception is to be adults only, no children should be included as part of the wedding party. Otherwise, parents of children who were not allowed to attend may feel slighted that clearly some exceptions are being made to allow children, while they were instructed to leave their kids behind. You may be thinking this to be a little unfair. After all, you are probably very familiar with the children in your wedding party and you probably selected them on the basis of their exemplary behavior in public, while the same may not necessarily be true of the other children. Give it some careful thought and if unsure, err on the side of caution by ensuring that no children really means NO children to avoid appearing offensive to any of your guests. (How ever it may help to have the children stay in there wedding clothes and sit close to the wedding party table to keep them tied to the wedding itself, if parents pay for there children to be in your wedding it would be a shame for them to have to go home to keep others from complaining. Just keep the kids in the wedding looking like they did at the wedding ceremony.)
• If cost issues are the reason you are considering the adults only route, keep in mind that the cost of feeding a child at the reception will be considerably less than the cost to feed an adult. Most caterers or reception sites have children's menus they will serve kids less than 12 years of age, typically at a dramatically lower cost. Many caterers will not inform you of this unless you specifically ask about it. Inquire with your caterer about the availability of child's plates. This may solve the entire dilemma for you so everyone can end up happy. What if someone does show up with their children, despite it all? Do you say something to them? Do you send someone over to them? Don't even dream it. What good would that possibly do? What is done is done. No sense in creating an unpleasant, uncomfortable situation. Nothing could be more unbecoming of a bride, groom, or host. Best advice? Take a deep breath, and then let it go. Put it out of your mind and get on with having a good time. This day is going to fly by faster than you'll ever want as it is; don't waste a single moment of it caught up in negativity. Remember, this is the best day of your life! Enjoy every moment you can. Happy Beginnings and I hope they last forever.